A New Life, A New Me?

I don’t know how many times I’ve prayed to get a new job and I couldn’t be happier but my life just turned upset down for the “good” of things. I always look at my life as God’s experiment and by the looks of things right now I’m internally asking myself is this how the majority of South Africans are living?

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The new job that I do I won’t disclose but I’m on what you call a trail-run where there are no incentives until after a month. In the back of my mind, I’m asking myself when will the sweet spot comes where I break the bank figuratively but right now it seems like I’m living paycheck to paycheck.

So as the antagonist of the system I started asking questions from my fellow colleagues to my mother who has worked for more years than I’ve been alive: Is this it?

And I was unsatisfied with her answer which was ” You make it work, With what you have” but at this rate, there’s no guarantee of happiness. Well I am happy but is this what happiness looks like

Because ever since I started the job I knock off and just want to sleep afterward, I don’t have time to even clean my room which is essential to mental health. I suffered for a long time from anxiety (Imagine) but in this modern world how could you not when the cost of living is at its highest. I read an article about Eastern Cape and how there’s a community where people died because they had nothing to eat. That to me is shocking. It’s almost like we are drug addicts busy paying to be alive and should existing be a price?

I like to refer to nature and how everything is survival of the fittest but with humans, it’s survival of the servants, where we slave all day every day for a chance of being happy. I might sing a new song as the incentives are close. But I tend to think about is ‘what is or what if,’ This system I use sometimes leads me to anxiety or good decisions both a curse and a gift. But as a gift, it prompted me to write this piece, to ask questions, and to seek justice but the more I strive seems like the ‘world’ already has its systems in place for example the petrol price or the price of bread and who can fight against systems that were formed way before I even existed.

If this is your life. Strive, God’s got you, and always, always put the spirit of excellence forward. Because from everything there’s a silver lining. A lesson of some sorts. And you won’t move on until you’ve learned that lesson, unfortunately. So be wise beau’s


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