Society; mainly African society, has groomed man into being figures that separate each other based on gender; superior and inferior scale and furthermore it has groomed man to behave in certain ways rather than the other. In 2017 the streets of social media trended on a #MenAreTrash trend which aimed at being the voice of the voiceless; a mouthpiece which spoke of the ill that has continuously being accepted in society based on the fact of a woman is disciplined when she tries to wear the pants of a man or rather a woman must know her place.

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The abnormal turned normal. That being what was pick from a generation that has passed through loads of other generations; others now have even turned into skeletons that could break anytime, if dug up. Why then as the new generation of man do you not rise up and be the solution to the problem that has actually segregated woman from man, forgetting that at the end of the day, we all remain man; just only different based on the wo that is put before men to define woman.
When pain transfers into anger, anger that remains within, instead of being voiced out through engagements that reflect not only on gender based violence, but other ills like; disowning your flesh and blood, having multiple partners that end up bitter
because of the abnormal behaviors that run through your head as normal.

The redefined man speaks about a man that is redefined, reshaped and restructured based on breaking the cycle; breaking both ill ideologies and behaviors that were instilled in a man by either previous ‘normal’ but yet abnormal actions that were experienced by one; physically or even to a loved one that holds a place, close to their heart. Others even ending up being killed right under their noses and all they felt was selfless, weak and simply unable to be a man. What is a man if a man isn’t defined by greatness? What is a man, if a man isn’t defined by himself rather than his pain that ended up being anger that ended him up in jail because he wanted to regain his power, that he once lost when he couldn’t save his mother and ended up in the streets, having to beg for everything up until he found his way and ended up with a woman who’s had it all and ended up being it all. There he stood right on top of a pool of blood, thinking what to next and there it was, right in that bin downstairs as he wheels her out, right through into the park. Days after he finds himself behind bars simply because he never spoke; simply because he is a man. Again, what is a man that fails to protect the vulnerable?

Be the man that you want your daughter, sister, cousins and mothers to be with instead of being the man that forgets that a woman is a part of him and that a woman compliments him; richer, poorer, intellectually stronger or more driven. She is there because she loves you; when she ticks you off walk away, be the bigger man and be the treasure instead of the trash; be the redefined man.

 

Article by Nkele Galedzana